she sells seashells

Andrew Largeman: So knock... knock and barter for Desert Storm trading cards.
Mark: Don't tease me about my hobbies. I don't tease you about being an asshole.

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Today I give you my list of items I collected when I was a kid.

* Stickers. I didn't know a single girl in my elementary school who did NOT collect stickers. The scratch n sniff varieties were my favorites. I'll go ahead and admit right now that I enjoy browsing in the sticker store in the LA Farmer's Market. And yes, I may have bought a few sheets of stickers there within the last year. Your point??

* Keychains. At some point I had in the 30-50 range of decorative key chains. I didn't really have any keys to put on them, so mostly I just hooked them all together then unhooked them. . My dad asked me whether my life's ambition was to become a janitor. I think I stopped collecting them shortly thereafter.

* Smurfs. Oh, I loved my smurf collection. Of course Smurfette was my favorite. (Why the hell was she the only girl?) If only I had known that they would fetch somewhere in the range of $3.99 per smurf I definitely would have held onto that collection. $3.99!!

* Painter's Caps. I'm not sure why my best friend and I were obsessed with these things, but we both collected them in 6th and 7th grade. I never really wore them that much, just collected them.

* Decks of cards/magnets from places I visited. Actually that magnet collection was an early 20's thing, not really a kid thing. In fact, I may still have them, though I haven't had a refrigerator that holds magnets (other than on the side) for some time.

I'm relatively sure that I made it through my entire childhood without falling prey to any sort of collectible trading cards.